It’s funny how we can get so caught up in things that were or never were. Things that needn’t matter anymore because they’ve passed by. We should try to focus more on the future. We can’t change the past, but we can control the future. Well, kind of…
I understand that it’s not easy. I have a hard time of letting certain things go too. When push comes to shove, however, it’s funny how I get over most things. Sometimes it only requires time (and sometimes way more than at others). There’s nothing wrong with that. As beings, especially for people who are reflective, we try to figure out every little aspect of certain details. What could we have done differently? What went wrong? What can we do to make it go better next time?
Perhaps it’s not a bad part of the process. After all, if we don’t learn from the past we are more apt to repeat it. It’s important to not forget, but rather we should dissect, digest, and get to work on the future.
Unsatisfied with results you’ve had from a relationship in the past? Aim to change yourself (because you cannot change another person), or decide to live with the relationship (which you shouldn’t do if you are truly unhappy), or decide the relationship needs termination. But don’t dwell on it forever. Stop feeling sorry. The past happened. It cannot be changed. The future has yet to happen. You can help mold it into a future you’d like.
Apply this thinking from relationships, to jobs, to finance, and so on. Lost money in a bad adventure or circumstance? Look at the money lost as the cost of experience. Now, hopefully, you’re dedicated to not doing the same thing again. Take speeding tickets, for instance. The law hopes that you hate losing money so badly that you will decide the fine is not worth speeding. If you truly believe this, you’ll quit speeding. If not, or you just don’t care, it’s unlikely that you’ll quit. Either way, look at the fine as part of the driving experience. After all, it needn’t be fun to be an experience. Sometimes, the best experience comes from the toughest lessons.